Wednesday's Women of Courage - Jane Doe

I lost a very close friend, and a very special person this weekend. Out of respect for her privacy, I will refer to her as Jane Doe.

In so many ways, Jane was typical of women of her generation. But in a very important and meaningful way, she was not.

In an era not conducive to the term "career woman", she boldly stepped away from her humble beginnings and set off to find work in "the big city". Her passion and knack for attention to detail propelled her career, and set her apart in the male-dominated oil industry.

It also brought her in proximity to her soul-mate and future husband. Like so many women today, she set aside her dreams, and chose instead to channel her boundless energy and feisty spirit to nurture life as a loving parent and grandparent, right up to her peaceful transition into eternal life.

Jane, thank you for your sacrifice and love. Until we meet again, RIP SDG JBHIV

Monday's Motivational Makeover Featuring Tess

Honest communication.

How honest is too honest?

Peeling the layers of the onion is my favorite pastime. A friend of mine says that I’m the “diagnostician of purpose and relevance”. It isn’t clear to me if he means that in a loving or a scrutinizing way but since we create most of our own meaning in our lives….I’ll take it in a loving way.

This week I’ve had a pinched nerve in my neck. Whenever there is a physical symptom I dig around in the emotional subterranean to see if there might be some other pinched nerve in my life where I’m not living authentically. After reviewing some of the domains of my life I came up with a couple of areas that may be suspect and in need of adjustment. Relationship is one such area.

Having made the decision to go “exclusive” in my romantic relationship recently, we are in the discovery phase of the mating dance where we get to define boundaries, communicate effectively and practice honesty (while still attempting to be attractive and desirable to each other). It has been years since I’ve shared this much time and conversation with an intimate other with the hopeful intention that it will evolve into a long term commitment.

Both communicators, we enjoy sharing thoughts through words, however, I’ve begun to notice that although a bonding experience, we have different modes of communicating. Additionally, when discussing needs and emotions, I find that I’m much more prone to directness and solving what I see as areas of frustration and inequity before they result in discontent.

My gentleman friend would rather let things go as he feels most things dissipate given time..

Since unresolved upset becomes toxic sludge in my school of thought, I would like to have a quick exchange where I put things on the table, shed some light, get a little validation or at least some air time….and then it doesn’t hold the “charge” energetically.

Once I do this, closeness is restored and I can get back to happy.

Gentleman friend is trying to adjust his rule book to these new requirements, but often I see a glassy eyed creature looking back at me and nodding slowly. My need for honesty doesn’t work the same for him…in fact it appears to get in the way of his “relatedness” with me. His level of honesty isn’t as rigorous as mine. Because of his importance to me, I’ve been able to adjust the frequency, my degree of intensity and my tone so that I can be heard. Thanking him for hearing me when we’re finished also seems to meet with his glassy eyed approval.

Honesty is high on my list of values. It is a good thing…and I don’t want to compromise….but…..

After force feeding honesty to my very patient friends and family… all of these years, after all of the classes and all of the books, and peeling the onion….i may have learned something invaluable.

Serving honesty up in a comforting and compassionate way is a very good thing.

Every relationship requires its own degree of honesty and being completely self expressed doesn’t serve the relationship unless the other person is equipped to receive the level of honesty with which you are communicating.

Since most of communication is non verbal here are a few ideas to consider:

Evaluating your nonverbal communication skills
Eye contact	Is this source of connection missing, too intense, or just right in yourself or in the person you are looking at?
Facial expression	What is your face showing? Is it masklike and unexpressive, or emotionally present and filled with interest? What do you see as you look into the faces of others?
Tone of voice	Does your voice project warmth, confidence, and delight, or is it strained and blocked? What do you hear as you listen to other people?
Posture and gesture	Does your body look still and immobile, or relaxed? Sensing the degree of tension in your shoulders and jaw answers this question. What do you observe about the degree of tension or relaxation in the body of the person you are speaking to?
Touch	Remember, what feels good is relative. How do you like to be touched? Who do you like to have touching you? Is the difference between what you like and what the other person likes obvious to you?
Intensity	Do you or the person you are communicating with seem flat, cool, and disinterested, or over-the-top and melodramatic? Again, this has as much to do with what feels good to the other person as it does with what you personally prefer.
Timing and pace	What happens when you or someone you care about makes an important statement? Does a response—not necessarily verbal—come too quickly or too slowly? Is there an easy flow of information back and forth?
Sounds	Do you use sounds to indicate that you are attending to the other person? Do you pick up on sounds from others that indicate their caring or concern for you?
Source: The Language of Emotional Intelligence, by Jeanne Segal, Ph.D.

What’s in your life is what you choose, choose consciously and powerfully!

Tess

Lifestyle Lifters with Evie

Since I received quite a few inquiries from our audience regarding Dr. Shirley Madhere’s Summer Essentials from Head to Toe, I thought I should follow-up and share some additional expert suggestions from the Renew Spa in New York City , located at 109 East 73^rd Street between Park and Lexington Avenue , 212 452-1012, www.therenewspa.com . If you do not live in New York , you can access Renew’s Web site for products and look for a spa in your area that may provide similar treatments.

Next week stay tuned for more PASSION ROMANCE FASHION …… Till then…. Enjoy life….. Evie

Facial skin: with warmer temps and higher humidity, switch your facial moisturizer from a cream to a lighter lotion or gel.

Thanks to modern facial skin care technology, the effects of aging on the skin caused by heredity, lifestyle, and environmental factors no longer have to be accepted as permanent. Today there are many facial rejuvenation options for individuals who would like to reduce wrinkles and fine lines, treat skin problems such as acne and rosacea, or enhance their facial skin care regimen to achieve a look that’s healthy and natural. We combine facial treatments with Renew Skin Care products which help to restore harmony and balance to your skin, allowing your natural beauty to shine through. Try Renew’s UltraSerum and Anti-Oxidant Gel.

Neck and chest: these parts are often forgotten in the daily skin routine. Extend application of facial moisturizer and sunscreen onto the neck and skin. Wrinkles in the décolletage may sometimes be managed with Botox or Dysport injections.

Now that summer is here we all want to show off our beautiful bodies. We sometimes forget the delicate part around the neck and décolletage. At Renew we have made-to-measure treatments that address these areas. Microdermabrasion serves to effectively treat sun-damages skin and age spots. Ultrasound is then applied to increase the blood flow stimulating the production of collagen for improved strength and resiliency.

Also, remember your back is exposed………Back facial involves microdermabrasion to help treat the appearance of sun damage, hyperpigmentation, age spots and to help reduce the signs of aging skin. Followed with a deep pore cleansing and steam to life impurities, followed by gentle extractions. Treatment is completed with a relaxing customized mask.

Torso: one of the best ways to complement a bikini-ready body is to have a toned abdomen ("belly") by eating well. Increase your metabolism in part by increasing your intake of whole plant-based foods as green, leafy vegetables (for fiber and protein) and vibrantly colored fruit (for vitamins and antioxidants).

Micro Current treatments can be used to target specific areas including face, neck, abdominals, arms, breast, buttocks, legs and thighs. Cellulite reduction and lymphatic detoxification are also benefits incorporated in every treatment. Any inch loss achieved in this treatment is the result of actually working and tightening the muscles. Whether you’re looking to kick-start a slimming plan or tackle those stubborn inches that hours in the gym just won’t shift, this is the treatment that will get you started on a firmer, tighter and more youthful body.

Thighs: if cellulite is an issue, recognize that it is the result of a number of factors as stress, excess fat, variegated fat distribution (even in absence of excess fat!), reduced skin elasticity, decreased lymphatic circulation, and others. To manage cellulite in time to be "summer body ready," it is helpful to begin treatments at least 6-8 weeks in advance. In general, there are a number of therapies that may be undertaken together as a part of a complete protocol to help produce a better result, as liposuction, mesotherapy, skin tightening laser, manual lymphatic drainage, topical creams, nutritional adjustments, and stress management techniques.

Cellulite is a major cosmetic concern for most women. Significant reductions in cellulite and dimpling can be seen in as few as six treatments with the TriActive LaserDermology system. This non-invasive cosmetic treatment can greatly improve the appearance of afflicted skin. Plus, with regular maintenance treatments your skin will continue to look firmer, smoother and healthier than it has in years!

Dr Vodder Manual Lymph Drainage techniques involve application of a very light touch applied to the skin’s surface over the areas with lymph nodes on the body and face. This treatment relaxes the body, mind and spirit! Also acts as a non-surgical facelift because it helps to relax the facial muscles, smoothes wrinkles and crow’s feet.

Body skin: touchably soft skin is appealing in any season. Skin is your best "accessory," even as it is vitally important organ! Exfoliate skin of the body in the shower with a loofah at least once weekly and follow up with a moisturizer (daily) containing rich emollients (for added smoothness) or alpha hydroxy acids sloughing non-viable skin cells).

Used to improve circulation, exfoliate the skin and assist the process of fat and cellulite absorption, Dry Brushing is an easy addition to your body treatment. Using a natural bristle brush for gentle massage, treatment is completed with an Organic Peppermint and Lemon lotion to refresh and soften body and tired feet.

Feet: formaldehyde in nail lacquers may discolor nails. Allow your nails to "breathe" from time to time by getting a "bare pedicure", no polish. Also, wearing flip flops potentially exposes feet to more elements-- environmental and non! Prevent cracked heels, which may pose a risk for infection, by keeping feet clean, and moisturized.

Keep your feet cool, hydrated and soft this summer. Have Renew’s cooling peppermint foot therapy.

TGIF - Odds and Ends that are in!

I'd like to wrap up the week with a few things that I want to share with you. Nothing heavy, just a couple of ways to solve some of the world's problems, that's all.

It's called The Girl Effect and if you do nothing else today but take 3 minutes to view their video, I think it will be well worth your while.

The other idea whose time has come are the Millennium Development Goals (MDGs) as set forth by the United Nations. One of their goals is to end world poverty by the year 2015.

I had the honor of being invited to attend a Press Conference and Luncheon recently for the MDG Awards Ceremony to be held later this fall.

The number three goal of the MDG is Gender Equality (why is this not #1?). For a (fairly) recent report on how this effort is shaping up click here. The notion of Gender Equality as supported by the UN has been around quite a while. Here is a link to one of their early proclamations concerning this topic.

Now that you have been exposed to these thought-provoking tid-bits, get out there and be a part of the solution as set forth by both The Girl Effect and the UN.

Then kick-back, relax, and enjoy more Lifestyle Lifters featuring Evie in tomorrow's post.

Have a great weekend! SDG, JBHIV

Thursday's Truth - Wall Street and Gender Equality

As many of you are aware, I am always looking for ways to "bridge the gap" between women and men. I was recently nominated to receive honorary membership in an exclusive, formerly women-only group called 85 Broads.

In capital markets, we call the exploitation of price differences, or gaps "arbitrage". Although there are many successful female fund managers in the industry today, the fact is, this area of finance is still woefully under served by women. A recent study by The National Council for Research on Women is recommended reading.

According to data collected by Bloomberg, L.P. from January 2000 - May 31, 2009, on average, funds managed by women produced annual returns of 9 percent, compared with a 5.82 percent average annual return by funds run by men.

Furthermore, in 2008, during the height of the financial crisis, funds run by women were down 9.6 percent versus a a 19 percent decline in those run by men.

I am currently working with two financial services firms, both of whom are women-owned and Women's Business Enterprise (WBE) certified. One of these has over $3.1B AUM. But these women are pioneers in a still male-dominated industry, that has a long way to go to be truly "women-friendly".

As Women of Wealth, you need to be involved in making sure your money is managed by a female money manager or team. Many financial services firms give lip service to being focused on the investment needs of women. They recognize that women now control almost 48% of the world's wealth, and this number will continue to rise.

Beware of those that have set up "female facades" targeting this lucrative demographic, only to hand over responsibility for managing their assets to male fund managers behind the scenes.

Should any of you need assistance in finding these female-run funds, please drop me a note at my 85 Broads website.

Wednesday's Women of Courage - Donna Palomba

In last Thursday's Truth post, I highlighted some of the facts surrounding sexual abuse, and sexual violence.

The truth is what led Donna Palomba to found Jane Doe No More, Inc. Her story of abuse as a victim of sexual assault and the subsequent abuse she suffered through the process of investigation, has been chronicled on NBC's Dateline.

Her courage to stand up for what she knew was corrupt behavior on the part of the law enforcement team assigned to her case, led to legislation removing the statute of limitations on sexual crimes involving DNA evidence.

You can read her entire story by clicking here.

It is a both an honor and a privilege for me to serve on the board of JDNM. I hope each of you will consider joining our cause through your financial support, or by participating in one of our events scheduled throughout the year.

Monday's Motivational Makeover Featuring Tess

JBHIV: Here is Tess' second installment in her series. In it she shares with us some tips on how to set healthy boundries:

Tess: As a professional in private service I know that keeping clean lines of communication and respect in the home are paramount yet difficult for many. Any long term relationship requires clean communication, interdependence, and self awareness. Structure provides parameters and direction for household employees and surprisingly, creates real freedom and quality of life for employers. Feel free to email tessgreen3@gmail.com if you would like assistance in customizing a service plan for your home.

Healthy Boundaries.

My first thought is that I am so aware of boundaries now because I’ve spent much of my life without them. Having lived in a commune in Bolinas California with my hippie mother, Ruth, and my sister, Jeri, in the late 60’s, I learned an existence of no boundaries. Sex, drugs, rock and roll and a lot of naked guitar players sitting around the living room singing Proud Mary was a Freudian field trip for a 5 year old Iowa girl. It imprinted on me at a cellular level.

I navigated through most of my life like an amoeba or the borders of a Rorschach test…no clear definition…just spilling onto everyone and absorbing everyone else.

Referring to this environment as porosity….I have come to appreciate my life long lesson on boundaries, because I can no longer operate in this confusion. Learning healthy boundaries and employing them has been the most refreshing, calming and self respecting step I could have ever taken. It keeps me clean and centered. Others can still trigger reaction from me, but I’m quick to recover.

Boundary devoid interaction confuses everyone involved, blurs emotions, causes upset, and fosters codependence. My sister and I refer to managing boundaries as “staying in your own skin”. Loved ones can get through the security gates easier than anyone because they know which buttons to push.

If you can afford the luxury of employing household staff such as a personal assistant, chef, nanny or housekeeper, you know that having someone in your inner sanctum, day in and day out, lends itself to eventual personal sharing and involvement. At a minimum, you become familiar or friendly. Be cautious of blurring the boundary between principal and employee too much because once you do it is difficult to recover. Disclosing too much of your life or your problems/needs will compromise your staff. One gentleman I worked for developed stage 4 lung cancer and “we” fought it for four years. He became dependent on me and our relationship became almost parent / child at times. This was a wealthy, powerful, brilliant and funny man who had an impenetrable outer crust in the beginning.

It happens slowly and under the radar. Be aware of this. Honor the integrity of your space and the well-being of your domestic staff by nurturing healthy boundaries.

· Provide an office or a workspace away from the central traffic of the home so that she/he has independence and a place to organize and revive. It is challenging to work in a home where you don’t have a workspace that is yours. It makes you feel invisible and almost unwanted as a service provider. Give them space away from the family to work at times. After all, they are in your private domain under your power and this can be very intimidating. The more confident and secure they feel, the better care they will take of you and your family.

· Make requests instead of demands. Demands rob people of their dignity.

· If you find it difficult to ask for what you need. Make a list of action items. Then the “action items” are neutral. I have one client who vascillates between being uncomfortable and timid about asking for my help and then goes to an extreme at times of entitlement and making demands.

· Set time aside once a week to have a review session. What is working, what needs attention, and clarify confusion.

· Identify service expectations. You will be surprised how much you expect your staff to be like you and read your mind and a job description will help you and your household staff to remember the job parameters.

When you have a conflict…and eventually you will...here are some:

Rules for Fair Confrontations

· Remember that sometimes you have to agree to disagree

· 31% of all conflicts are solvable and 69% are unsolvable problems (Gottman, 1999)

Rules for Fair Confrontations

· If possible, arrange to talk when you are feeling good about yourself

· Choose the right time and place

· Get away from the win/lose concept

· Be direct and specific

· Know what you are asking for and what results you desire

· Bring up only one item and stick to it

· Focus on the behavior, not the person

· Do not hit below the belt- don’t bring up topics about which the person is especially sensitive

· Don’t try to mind read. ASK.

· Do not generalize – “you always”, “ you never”.

· Emphasize the positive along with the negative.

What’s in your life is what you choose. Choose consciously and powerfully!

Celebrities, Philanthropies, and Charities: Honor Thy Mother AND thy Father...

...because increasingly, they are both. Although Women of Wealth may find themselves today, Father's Day, providing for their children as both female and male role model, many do not realize that a substantial number of women do so, however, under extremely difficult economic circumstances.

In last Thursday's Truth post, I highlighted the issues of child abuse, domestic violence, and sexual assault. Many women have bravely left the comfort of a marriage, or co-dependent relationship, to get their children out of harm's way - and break the cycle of abuse.

But here are some sobering facts from U.S. Census Data and Not Just Getting By!: Single Working-Poor Mothers and Education, Mary Gatta, Ph.D., Center for Women and Work, Rutgers University

Single mothers are increasingly running the show with 80% of single-parent families headed by women.

There are 12,905,000 one-parent families in the United States — 10,404,000 are headed by women; 2,501,000 are headed by men.

• 47% of women are on their own.
• 27% are single.
• 20% are divorced, separated or widowed.

---

Single mothers lack the financial safety net of a spouse

• 22% of single working mothers earn more than $30,000 per year.
• 14% of single working mothers earn more than $50,000 per year.
• 5% of single working mothers earn more than $75,000 per year.
• 50% of married working women earn more than $40,000 per year.

---

Single mothers generally fare worse financially than single fathers

• 16% of all single parent male family households live in poverty.
• 35% of all single parent female family households live in poverty.
• Overall, women earn about 74% of men's wages.

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More than 80% of single moms lack the education they need to advance in a career

• 83% of single mothers have a high school diploma.
• 33% of single mothers have some college education.
• 16% of single mothers have a bachelor's degree or higher.

60% of sales-related jobs in the service sector require skills beyond high school.
Jobs that require advanced skills are experiencing significant growth.
High level skills are required across industries.

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Women are working every day—and not getting ahead

• 99% of all American women will work for pay at some point in their lifetime.
• 60.7% of mothers with children under the age of 3 work.

Women comprise 46% of labor force.
Women's labor force participation is expected to grow to over 2.3 million in 2015.

Whether you are a single mom, married with children, or single with no kids, please take time today, or this week, to reach out to one of your fellow women who may not be as fortunate. Or, give freely of your time and/or money to support an organization that has a scholarship fund to assist single moms with the cost associated with furthering their education, which will help them build a better life for their children.

One such organization is The Women's Independence Scholarship Program.

WISP, Inc. is a private family foundation founded by Doris Buffett and funded through her generosity. The mission of the foundation reflects the midwestern values and no-nonsense approach to decision-making that Doris grew up with in Omaha , Nebraska . Each scholarship is considered an investment, and the decision to grant funds is always based on an expected successful return. Doris Buffett is grateful to her father and brother not only for providing her with the wealth to fund the foundation but also for their inspirational examples of integrity and generosity.

Doris is passionate about her responsibilities as a philanthropist and good citizen; her energy and enthusiasm are boundless. Among her many other roles, she has been a first grade teacher, domestic violence crusader, political activist, mother and grandmother. She is the self appointed Buffett family genealogist and her avocation is historic preservation.

Since its inception in 1999 the Women’s Independence Scholarship Program has awarded more than $16 million in scholarships to some 2,000 women across the United States.

Lifestyle Lifters featuring Evie

This week I decided to bring you some beauty and wellness , lets face it , without beauty and wellness we cannot enjoy “ PASSION ROMANCE FASHION “ to the fullest……… so here it goes !!

Dr. Shirley Madhere is a plastic surgeon www.thenewaesthete.com , fellowship trained in cosmetic surgery, who is experienced in providing a complete spectrum of care to her reconstructive as well as cosmetic plastic surgery patients. Her medical expertise includes skin care , non-invasive techniques, and health and age management. The fusion of these concepts provides a multidisciplinary approach to aesthetics, wellness, and form and function which Dr. Madhere has unified as a “ Holistic “ approach to plastic surgery. She travels the world uncovering beauty and well being secrets …….. I am so lucky to have her as my friend !!!!! I have asked her to provide me with her tips “ Summer Essentials from Head to Toe “ to share with you so that you can look and feel your best this summer !!! Till next week …. Enjoy Life …. Evie

Summer Essentials from Head to Toe

by Shirley Madhère, M.D.

These tips will help you to glow naturally!

Hair: in summer, the sun may weaken hair by damaging its protein bonds. Use hair-specific sunscreen or, for product-free protection, use scarves, headbands, or head wraps. Also, a healthy scalp leads to healthy hair. Rinse hair as soon as possible after swimming and apply a deep conditioning treatment once or twice weekly, preferably one that helps hair to retain moisture and prevent dryness.

Facial skin: with warmer temps and higher humidity, switch your facial moisturizer from a cream to a lighter lotion or gel.

Neck and chest: these parts are often are forgotten in the daily skin routine. Extend application of facial moisturizer and sunscreen onto the neck and skin. Wrinkles in the decolletage may sometimes be managed with Botox or Dysport injections.

Hands: colds and flus can be year-round. Reduce chances of these nuisances by using good hand hygiene and washing hands as often as needed. After hand washing, apply a moisturizer with sunscreen. This keeps hands soft and less prone to aging "sun spots." "Veiny" hands or hands with deep wrinkles may be improved in appearance by using injectable fillers to plump up the volume.

Torso: one of the best ways to complement a bikini-ready body is to have a toned abdomen ("belly") by eating well. Increase your metabolism in part by increasing your intake of whole plant-based foods as green, leafy vegetables (for fiber and protein) and vibrantly colored fruit (for vitamins and antioxidants).

Thighs: if cellulite is an issue, recognize that it is the result of a number of factors as stress, excess fat, variegated fat distribution (even in absence of excess fat!), reduced skin elasticity, decreased lymphatic circulation, and others. To manage cellulite in time to be "summer body ready," it is helpful to begin treatments at least 6-8 weeks in advance. In general, there are a number of therapies that may be undertaken together as a part of a complete protocol to help produce a better result, as liposuction, mesotherapy, skin tightening laser, manual lymphatic drainage, topical creams, nutritional adjustments, and stress management techniques. Ask your plastic surgeon for which you are the best candidate.

Body skin: touchably soft skin is appealing in any season. Skin is your best "accessory," even as it is vitally important organ! Exfoliate skin of the body in the shower with a loofah at least once weekly and follow up with a moisturizer (daily) containing rich emollients (for added smoothness) or alpha hydroxy acids (for sloughing non-viable skin cells).

Feet: formaldehyde in nail lacquers may discolor nails. Allow your nails to "breathe" from time to time by getting a "bare pedicure", no polish. Also, wearing flip flops potentially exposes feet to more elements-- environmental and non! Prevent cracked heels, which may pose a risk for infection, by keeping feet clean, and moisturized.

TGIF - Today is International Picnic Day!

Yes, it is true. There is a holiday for everything! So if where you are today brings weather favorable for a picnic, may I suggest you pack up the Rolls, and head to the nearest exclusive and private venue you can find.

Because now there is a true "Rolls-Royce" of picnic baskets, pictured here.

Called the Picnic Cabinet Set, it's made from wood and leather and is equipped to serve four people. Featuring crockery and eating utensils, it is a beautiful little thing.

Sixty centimetres high, in a clever little move you can also shift the pieces around to release a chopping board.

The front sports the marque's emblem and it's exclusively available through Rolls-Royce private commission.

Too bad that Barney's of New York no longer offers its Ultimate Picnic which included a magnum of Moët & Chandon Rosé Impérial, four tulip flutes, and two lacquered picnic boxes filled with an assortment of savory and sweet treats—from mini lobster wraps and smoke salmon mousse to pink chocolate-dipped strawberries and pink truffles. At $1,500, this was a small price to pay considering the price of a Rolls and it's matching basket.

But for those us who like the finer things in life, a Rolls-Royce Picnic may very well make today the best holiday of the year!

Thursday's Truth - What do we really know about...

...the epidemic of domestic violence?



...the epidemic of child abuse?



...the epidemic of sexual violence?


Here are some shocking statistics courtesy of The Joyful Hearts Foundation:

• Every two minutes someone in the United States is sexually assaulted.
• 1 in 6 women are survivors of sexual assault.
• 90% of sexual assaults are committed by someone the survivor knows

• .Every year, up to 10 million children are exposed to domestic violence.
• Every year, there are up to 3 million reports of child abuse or neglect made.
• Every day, in the United States, 4 children die from Child abuse and neglect.

The painting displayed on this page is one that JHF founder, Mariska Hartigay uses as a daily inspiration: "Its serenity, its powerful stillness, reminds me that I am continuously being invited on a journey-what the artist, Zoe Hersey, calls the "pilgrimage into one's self"."

Let's begin our own pilgrimage by being truthful.

We all see situations that have all the makings of domestic violence- but go unreported.

We have seen "discipline" being applied to a child, when really, it is abuse - physical, or verbal.

And many of you have had "consensual intercourse" with a partner when, in fact, it is Date Rape.

Truth hurts. But the scars these acts leave behind, hurt much more.

As many of you know, I serve on the board Jane Doe No More, Inc. which is dedicated to shortening the time from crime to healing for victims of sexual assault. While there are many places women can go for support, very few take advantage of them. Many are embarrassed, shamed, or scared to report these acts - and get the help they need. Many find themselves abused by the process, adding insult to injury.

JDNM and JHF share similar missions. Both were founded by women who are authentic, and passionate about their mission. I encourage you to take a moment and view the stories of both Donna and Mariska.

But more importantly, stop living a lie, and begin with the truth. The life you save may be your own!

Wednesday's Women of Courage - Delilah Rothenberg

This week's profile in Women's Courage features Delilah Rothenberg. She and I met at a HBS Club/85 Broads event last year. What struck me immediately was the intensity and passion with which she spoke about her work helping bring prosperity and hope to the disadvantaged in Africa, and beyond. More remarkably, this is a mission she has felt strongly about from a very young age. Among a generation that has a generally "ME" focus, she is truly a standout. It has taken a lot of courage to leave the security of a privileged background to make a difference in the world, but this is the essence of writing one's Social Biography:

She is the Founding Principal of Development Capital Strategies, LLC (DCS). Previously, she worked with Bear, Stearns & Co in Institutional Equities. Prior to Bear, Delilah developed educational programs with industry executives for investors at Gerson Lehrman Group. She also has experience with emerging markets private equity, having worked with Zephyr Management. Delilah serves on the Business Council for Peace Executive Council and Board, is the founder of their Young Professionals Committee, and was on their founding mission to Rwanda. She is an active member of Angel Africa, 85 Broads, and Seeds of Peace. Delilah has a B.A. in History, Politics, and Africa Studies from NYU, where she received the Dean’s Award in Politics, served as Co-President of Pi Sigma Alpha, and studied Swahili. She holds the Series 7 and Series 63 licenses. Delilah’s work has been featured in the New York Times, on CNN, NPR, among others.

We will continue to follow her activities and I will post upcoming events around her work as they become available. In the meantime, please take a look at her website and contact her directly if you want to become involved in any of her efforts.

Tuesday's Treasure (Island) - Paradise in Wakaya!

I am pre-empting today's usual post on Art & Collectibles to bring you a treasure of Mother Nature very few know about but many have dreamed about - Wakaya Private Island Resort. In the words of founders David and Jill Gilmour, " The more the world changes, the more we gravitate to places that don’t".

The Wakaya Club & Spa is situated on Wakaya Island, Fiji, a private 2,200 acre hideaway that is one of 333 islands that comprise the Fiji group. Wakaya Island is surrounded by a protected coral reef, and the island boasts serene lagoons, majestic cliffs and pristine white sand beaches.

Here, one needs no formal occasion—celebration is woven into the fabric of the day. It seems to be a Wakayan birth right.

The Wakaya Club & Spa offers an elegant yet casual backdrop for romance and celebration. Imagine an ecologically sensitive luxury resort offering unparalleled natural beauty in an intimate setting. The Wakaya Club & Spa extends a warm and gracious Fijian welcome on a privately owned 2,200-acre island with exceptional personal service and the finest cuisine in the South Pacific.

Romantic celebrations on Wakaya can include the following:

• Weddings on Wakaya
• Honeymoon
• Wedding Anniversaries & Vow Renewals
• Private Beach Picnics

As a Woman of Wealth, this venue may very well be just what you need to bring some Romance back into your life or undergo a personal transformation/motivational makeover. Please contact them if you need more information, or drop me an email and I will give you more insight into this exclusive destination.

Monday's Motivational Makeover by Tess

JBHIV: Teresa (Tess) Green has been a personal manager/personal assistant to High Net Worth clients in Austin, Texas for over 15 years. In this role, she offers home management/organization/ concierge and personal assisting/life organizing services. Teresa is also the creator of Passionfruit tv, a pilot program for living and loving passionately. You may contact her at: Tessgreen3@gmail.com

This is the first in a series of her perspectives on how to live a life of fullness AND ease:

Claritee

Living a full life can sometimes begin to look more like complication, clutter and managing minutia.

This will eventually begin to rob us of balance and ease and slowly, subsequently, joy and freedom in our lives.

Working with people to distill chaos into practical thought and manageable action is my passion.

When you find that your days are filled with confusion and obligations instead of quality time and experiences it is necessary to take inventory of the various domains that exist around you.

By looking at areas that comprise your world you can distinguish where you are spending your precious energy and time. This will reveal where imbalances exist and allow you to make adjustments and place structures so that you can be conscious and accountable for what you are creating in your life. If you are in balance, energy is fluid and light however, if you are out of balance, it is time for an alignment.

Take stock of the departments of your life and under each domain create a work breakdown structure. Simply put, list the details of each area that comprise the committee in your head that never lets you rest…. your unrequited subconscious chatter….To do list.

· Home

· Career

· Family

· Friends

· Money

· Fitness

· Health and Vitality

· Creativity

· Romance

· Community and Charity

· Beauty and wellness

· Academic

· Etc.

For example:

Family…

o Take kids to camp

o Card to Aunt Ruth

o Father’s day gift to dad

o Visit Julie in rehab

Etc…

This seems simple, but if you don’t have a way to organize thoughts and plan your life, it will eventually take a toll on your well-being. Carry a pad in your car/purse, use a DayTimer or MS Outlook. Once a week sit down and take your inventory and plan the details out or just keep the exercise where you can glance at it from time to time.

Getting to ease and freedom in your thoughts and your life can take a little processing, however, getting the ”conversation” out of your head and onto paper can be a relief in and of itself. People often medicate discomfort in their spirit and lives through a variety of avenues but claritee is just an insight away if you are willing to look inside.

What’s in our lives is what we choose. Choose consciously and powerfully.

Next time ~ setting healthy boundaries!

Lifestyle Lifters - Evie on Absolute Passion

Life is a journey filled with a variety of emotions. My wish for all of you , is that in your lifetime you experience

“ABSOLUTE PASSION “ . Today I bring you Absolute Passion by EvieVision . For more stories and videos on Passion Romance Fashion visit the “ theater “ and the “garden” at www.evievision.com . Till next week …… Enjoy Life , Evie.

What is absolute passion?

Absolute passion is inevitable meetings in lucid dreams, flying high through boundless skies, waltzing barefoot on the linoleum, licking each other is wounds, making love in the afternoon. Every morning awakening through sleep is bleary eyes, passions growing stronger every time; a shining smile alighting the senses, cosmic mirror of translucent eyes revealing fantasies lived last night. Peace and joy at each other is hands. Absolute passion exists in a realm beyond space and time, before you are even aware of its existence it is aware of you.

Absolute passion is an axiom; it simply is.

Otherworldly, intangible, indescribable, inscrutable, je ne sais quoi; the most intricately twisted pattern of subtleties, nuances and minute obscurities, knitted into a gorgeously delectable and completely unknowable entity. Ephemeral beyond rational perception, indivisible; do not try to deconstruct it, just be with it. Let it resonate through your soul like a thousand singing ohms, a vibrating tickle within your neurons.

Absolute passion is a work in progress, an emotional story between a woman and her lover forever unfolding; fluid, morphing, forming and re-forming, converging and merging into one, a journey that is its own reward.

Absolute passion is timeless, formless, senseless, filling the void, bringing stability to wandering souls, rooting and giving faith in the omnipotence of immortal love.

Aaah, love etc without love absolute passion doesn't exist, it cannot subsist, it sputters and fades. With love, absolute passion is eternal; a most ravishing gift from the beyond, the purest spark of fire, internal oceanic rush, release of electron storm.

Never confuse passion with sex. Absolute passion is the ultimate quest. It takes great strength to surrender to vulnerability. Never confuse vulnerability with weakness, it is your greatest asset.

Absolute passion transforms kissing into poetry, hanging on lips like harmonious mantras, on the neck like insatiable goose bumps, on the chest like effortless meditation, on the thighs like honeydew, delicious, extraordinary, precious. Even after long years together the belly still flips in an endless game of wily sensuality, enticement and acquiescence.

Absolute passion is the rarest of faunas, the infinity line where the sea becomes the horizon, mystical threads tying relationships together. You need only have faith in the intangible and reach out for it. Absolute passion is the interplay, mergence of opposites, both pacifying and electrifying, ying-yanging forces in a mysterious impulsive cobweb, mutable, malleable, elemental.

It is salty and sweet rolled into one, light and dark, adventure and rest; a symphony of inexhaustible energies bouncing off each other, the rhythmic dance that guides.

Absolute passion is the apex of emotion, beyond desire and lust, the invisible tie that binds.

Embrace your absolute passion and do not fear it, release it into the universe. Share your warmth, your wants and desires, your emotional scars, your soft side. Lavish your lover with little secrets, reveal your sweet spots and hidden tickle lines, divulge the ceaseless valleys of your mind. Accept the beautiful challenge to discover your lover for the rest of your lives and continue to write your ecstatic story together. Make every kiss like the first time.

Do you dare?

TGIF - Love the Skin You Are In!

It has been said that the eyes are the window to the soul. If true, then your skin is the fabric that holds your soul in place. And radiant, healthy, and smooth skin are more than a sign of beauty - it also reflects how you feel inside.

We all know that with age comes visible signs - a sagging brow, a few more wrinkles on the forehead, etc. Many of you may have already tried Botox or traditional methods of facial rejuvenation.

Sharon Littzi, MD has always been at the cutting edge of cosmetic dermatology. And she is a true testament to how women can succeed with the right attitude and the best training.

She was valedictorian of her high school class. She did residencies at both Yale and Harvard Medical School. She was invited to stay on the Dermatology staff and founded the Women's Dermatology Unit, the first cosmetically-oriented skin care center for women in Boston and at Harvard.

She then founded Aesthetic Dermatology of Fairfield County with offices in Greenwich and New Canaan, CT, and another planned in Manhattan, N.Y. Those of you who are within a car or plane ride of one of these offices would be well served by her practice.

For those of you at a distance, you are in luck - Dr. Littzi has developed her own line of skin care products, created through years of experience with countless other products.

They are available through her website, and come with a recommended usage for different skin types.

Thursday's Truths - Lillian Lincoln Lambert

JBHIV: So many of you enjoyed last week's Women of Courage post featuring Author, Motivational Speaker, and Entrepreneur Lillian Lincoln Lambert, that I have asked her to be Special Guest Blogger for today's post. Here are her thoughts on staying true to yourself, through good times and bad:

The last couple of years have been tough times for many people – lost jobs, reduced pay, inability to maintain a standard of living – the list goes on. Some have weathered the storm and others have succumbed to the challenges they faced.

I offer some points to get through difficult times but they are also applicable in good times.

1. Be flexible with your plan. Planning is a tool to serve as a roadmap to get to your destination. It’s good to have a short term as well as a long term plan. However, your plans should not be set in concrete. They should serve as guides to give you direction. As you mature, face challenges, or have a change in the idea of where you want to go there may be the need to alter your plan. It is important to have that option as things change or new opportunities present themselves. Have enough leeway to make those changes and still arrive at your destination.

2. Don’t be afraid to move outside of your comfort zone. If what you have always done is not working, be willing to take calculated risks and try something new. Most people are reluctant to change because of uncertainty or the unfamiliar. While it is much easier to stay with the familiar there may become a time when change is indicated. Your field of expertise may be in a downturn and that may be just the time to look at a new area. Do the necessary research to get information you need to make you more comfortable then make your move.

3. Use your network. When I finished graduate school I was so anxious to get out and leave that environment, I never wanted to look back. Years later, I realized what a mistake that was. Many of my classmates could have been a real resource to me had I made the effort. Maintaining relationships from school, previous employment and even social contacts may pay off in ways you never expect, but you must feed your network.

4. Look on the bright side. Losing that job or not getting that promotion may be the impetus you need to explore other possible opportunities. Occasionally something that seems to be a disaster may actually be a blessing in disguise. I was able to convert my part-time business into a full-time one after I was fired from my full time job. Challenges frequently offer an opportunities and opportunities are likely to have challenges. Uncover them. Don’t throw a pity party or you may find you are the only one attending.

Dream big, act bold!

Wednesday's Women of Courage - Suzanne V. Hascoe

This post is dedicated to a most remarkable woman. She was not well known, but well respected, and well loved. Her name is Suzanne Hascoe. This past May, she lost her courageous battle with Lung Cancer. She is pictured here (r) with Sophia James, Curator of The Hascoe Art Collection.

Those of us that appreciate art, remember the vast collection of Czech Modern Art, Masters, and Sculpture that she and her late husband, Norman, collected and offered for display.

Reflecting her interests in art, antiques and medicine, she was a member of the Chairman's Council as well as a Fellow for Life of the Metropolitan Museum of Art. She also sat on the Board of The Bruce Museum in Greenwich, Connecticut and was an Associate Member of the Board of the Whitehead Institute for Genetic Research at MIT.

Few of us knew that Suzanne was a former biochemist in cancer research. She worked for the Burroughs Welcome Company, which under a grant from Sloan Kettering, developed the first chemotherapy drug for treating childhood leukemia. She worked directly for the scientists who received the Nobel Prize for this breakthrough medical treatment.

She will be remembered by family and friends for her keen intellect, engaging personality, incredibly warm smile, elegant taste and exquisite style.

Tuesday's Treasure

I have the good fortune of counting among my neighbors, Patricia Funt Oxman. You may recognize her maiden name as that of her father, Allen Funt, creator of the Candid Camera TV series which ran from 1948 up until a few years ago. A return of the show is in the works, I understand.

For over ten years she had Patricia Funt Gallery at 50 1/2 East 78th Street, off Madison Avenue in New York City. A fun and eclectic mix of antique objects, the shop was a favorite haunt of a number of celebrities, socialites and decorators.

After marrying an Englishman in the early 1990's, they moved, started a family and opened a new shop - Patricia Funt Antiques, on Main Street, New Canaan, in Connecticut.

Patricia still stocks her store with fun and interesting antiques. The shop is known for unusual objects for the collector, such as corkscrews, snuff boxes, matchsafes, Victorian jewelry and much more.Wood carvings are a favorite. There are always lots of Black Forest carvings and all sorts of objects in the form of animals. There are sporting collectibles, items for the table, including a large selection of napkin rings. There are military antiques, nautical antiques, royal commemoratives, children's pottery, miniature furniture and a wonderful, large collection of English Pond Yachts.

Patricia and I thought it might interest WWRG followers to dedicate Tuesday's blog post to the topic of collectors. Many of you are Art and Antique collectors, or have admired them.

So beginning next week, we will feature Patricia as guest blogger, who in addition to her business acumen, also has a knack for writing. She has graciously offered to share the many tales that only a woman growing up among the greatest celebrities, socialites, and dignitaries of the last century, can tell. She will also provide insight into what collectors may find interesting given the vast array of collectibles and collections available today.

I also encourage you to visit her website to view some of the items she has to offer.

More Zinio Happenings!

In last Friday's TGIF post, I mentioned Zinio and the revolution they are bring to bear on the publishing industry. It had been a while since I checked in with them to get the latest news.

As luck would have it, I received this lovely e-mail late Friday from Zinio CEO and President, Rich Maggiotto:

Dear John Over the past decade, Zinio has been a trendsetter in digital media for publishers and consumers alike. With the proliferation of new devices and platforms, the visibility of digital reading is growing daily. As you likely already know, recently Zinio has launched cross-platform services internationally, with applications for online browser-based reading, iPhone, iPad, and applications built on Adobe AIR. We now sell magazines and books on five continents, in 25 languages, and 15 currencies from a global network of online newsstands, partners, resellers, and devices. Here are some things you shouldn't miss... THIS MONTH'S ANNOUNCEMENTS iPad app extensions in nine additional countries: Australia, Canada, France, Germany, Italy, Japan, Spain, Switzerland, UK. Interactive advertising with retailers and catalogers (i.e, Macy's) introducing in-app shopping to magazines. Publisher co-branded applications for iPad and iPhone. Print and digital bundling option for publishers. WHAT'S NEXT? Zinio for Android Smartphone and Android Slate. Extended global reach, new markets in China, India, and Japan. Major feature growth and enhancements to iPad and iPhone applications. New and improved updates to existing AIR reader app and online reader. It is our mission to provide our publisher clients with solutions that enable them to reach a new kind of consumer, within a complex and evolving digital media landscape. In the first half of this year already, over 1,000 major titles have come aboard to Zinio's global platform,including publications like National Geographic, SPIN, Vogue France, Bloomberg, GEO, Sporting News, Wallpaper*, Frommer's, InStyle, to name a few! Take advantage of our creative services, distribution platform, and best-in-class reading applications. Now is the time to take your digital publishing to new heights. Please reach out to the Zinio executive team or your account manager if you would like to discuss our products and services personally. Respectfully, Rich Maggiotto President & CEO, Zinio rmaggiotto@zinio.com